What happens in our family . . . . . .

I am now the oldest member of my generation of my mother's family. My cousin who has been a part of my life for 78 years 3 months and 1 day was laid to rest today. I have said good bye and paid my last respects to many members of my family, including my husband and a grandchild but this was different. 

Yes there was grief and many tears. There were days when I didn't think my life would ever return to normal. Then I started to realize that she had been a part of my life longer than anyone I have ever known. When I was at the funeral home watching the old pictures streaming on a tv screen,  my cousin's daughter said to me "you remember these pictures because you knew her before we did". That's true!

All of a sudden I became the one knew everything about my family. Not because I am a genealogist and knows our family history. No, not at all. I became the person who knew what everyone was like. What they were really like. The people I grew up with. A cousin wanted to know what her grandparents were like; she hardly knew them. I grew up with them. What was her dad like when he was a little kid. Who was the oldest. Did they go to church. Did my Aunt ever smile? And I could say absolutely - she smiled after we went to the ice cream store.

I was bombarded with questions. How many times have I told a group of beginning genealogists that they need to interview their older relatives so old memories and folklore can be preserved? I never had to do that because my aunts "interviewed themselves" around the dining room table after dinner when I was growing up. 

As I drove out of that American Legion Hall I realized I am the person who now needs to be interviewed. Not about my ancestors, but about the persons I grew up with. For me that is still today. But for the younger members of my family it is yesterday.

On my way home there was a huge bolt of lightning and then a small amount of thunder. It scared the living daylights out of me. I am pretty sure it was my aunts' way of saying what happens in our family, stays in our family.